The Importance of Being Apologetic
by Henna Ryans
Summary: Mamoru is finally held accountable for the breakup in Season Two.


The Sailor Moon R breakup bothers me because Mamoru never apologizes to Usagi for treating her like crap. It just doesn't sit right that everything is all rosy between them after the nightmares stop. I mean...Mamoru forces the split on her without telling her why and Usagi never questions the implications (impli-wha?) of that decision. So here is my version of the long awaited apology. It takes place after the Black Moon Clan is defeated.

Disclaimer: Sailor Moon is not mine.

It was a trap. He was sure of it. The way she left the question hanging between them set off sirens in his head. She may as well have asked him if she looked fat in her dress or if he thought the waitress was attractive. This was dangerous territory and he needed to proceed carefully or else he'd find himself stepping on the landmine hidden in her words. He gazed up at Usagi as she sat across from him, eyes shining and eagerly awaiting his response.

How did it come to this?

Their date started off wonderfully. It was a beautiful, sunny day and they took every advantage of it by strolling through the park's extensive flower gardens. When they came across a swing in one of the more wooded sections, they took turns pushing each other on it and seeing who could jump the farthest. It was a rare moment when the ever stoic Chiba Mamoru shucked off his aloof exterior and indulged in childlike activities. He could tell by the radiant smile she'd worn at that time that she was thrilled that he was comfortable enough to let loose around her.

Mamoru was anything but comfortable now.

He'd taken her back to the Crown Fruit Parlour as a nice finish for their day together, anticipating her unnatural appetite but he certainly HAD NOT expected her to stop feasting abruptly and turn a quizzical look on him. He'd walked unwittingly into a trap when he acknowledged the shift in her temper. The blonde smiled at him and using the sweetest lilt she could muster, asked a question that had the equivalent effect of a dropping bomb.

"How do you feel about me, Mamo-chan?"

Oh, it seemed like a simple enough question; innocent, in fact. But Mamoru was no fool. Usako knew exactly how he felt about her. He loved her and had told her so many times over. There was something else going on here and he groaned internally as he tried to deconstruct her question once again. He was quickly getting nowhere and the tears welling up in her eyes only increased the panic he was feeling. He'd left her hanging for too long already; he reasoned that no answer he gave could be worse than saying nothing at all.

"You're my world Usako." He tried to it make sound as if he had been searching for the perfect way to express his affections, hoping against hope that this was the right answer.

His encouraging smile fell instantly as Usagi's face went from heartbroken to conniving in under five seconds.

"And since I'm so important to you, you must value me quite a bit, right?"

…

"Y-yes." Mamoru could barely think over the deafening ring of the alarm bells in his mind. Usagi was being particularly articulate and calculated. It unnerved him.

"Would you say that I'm a good leader?"

He gave her a confused look. "Like with the Senshi?" Her line of questioning seemed almost random.

She nodded and Mamoru sighed in relief. Maybe, just maybe this had nothing to do with him. Perhaps she just felt the need to be reassured of her role as Sailor Moon and the future Neo-Queen Serenity.

"Of course, Usako! You're a great leader. You're what holds the Senshi together and encourages them to fight with their whole heart!"

His confident declaration made a genuine smile blossom across her face.

"And people can confide in me and trust my decisions?"

Mamoru reached for her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

"Without a doubt, love."

"Even you?"

He furrowed his brows. The hairs on his outstretched arm started to prickle with the sudden realization that this wasn't going to end well.

"What are you saying Usako?" He might as well bite the bullet, since coaxing it out of her only seemed to be causing him more trouble.

"Well, I was just thinking about our relationship," she replied almost nonchalantly, stirring her milkshake with a straw.

"Okay…" Now he had NO idea where this was going.

"And I don't think you really respect me…" She trailed off, avoiding his eyes as she turned to gaze out the window.

Anger seemed to flood his veins. What the hell?! Of course he respected her! He thought about her welfare more than he thought of his own. He always made sure she got home safely after their dates, he never once pushed her for a physical relationship, and he certainly didn't distract her when he knew she had a test coming up. He was a perfect gentleman to her and having her accuse him otherwise was a personal insult.

"Aren't you a little young to be making that kind of claim?" His curt response had tears gathering in her eyes again. He knew it was a low blow but he felt the need for a little revenge since she had offended his honour.

"That's EXACTLY the kind of attitude I'm talking about!" Her voice broke as she scrubbed her eyes with the back of her hand. "You treat me like I'm a child…y-you don't see me as your equal! You say 'I'm your world,' but you're constantly making me feel like I'm too immature to understand you or make my own decisions. W-well I've got n-news for you M-mamo-chan." He could see that she was barely holding it together at this point. "I-I've saved this world not once but TWICE now! A-and I may be a cry baby at times b-but I've faced things people my age should n-never have to! I'm not weak and I'm not a little kid!"

One look at his angel with tears flowing freely down her face and he immediately felt like crap. Mamoru reached over the table to take her hand but she jerked it away and with a pang of hurt he withdrew. Somehow he'd managed to ruin this whole day in one conversation and he still wasn't sure how or why it had started.

"Usako." It was barely breathed but it sounded so gentle, almost reverent and absolutely pathetic. Pain-filled blue eyes watched him manoeuvre from his side of the booth to take the seat next to her. Pulling her into his embrace, Mamoru murmured apologies into her hair.

"I'm so sorry, honey. I didn't mean it. I overacted." Sighing heavily, he pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. "Please tell me where this is all coming from." She lifted her head from under his chin and searched his eyes for a moment before deciding that he was indeed earnest.

"Remember when you were having those nightmares a few months back?" She felt his body stiffen around her. Those dreams had haunted Mamoru every night with the image of her death on replay. It had nearly driven him mad and was still very painful for him to think about.

His response so was quiet that she barely heard it.

"I remember."

"I know that you broke up with me because you were trying to protect me, but why couldn't you have confided in me, Mamo-chan? It hurt so much that you didn't even consider sharing your struggle with me. You just made your decision and forced it on me. How can you respect me if you won't discuss things with me? If you only dictate what's best for me without even talking to me about it?"

Mamoru brushed away a few stray tears on her face as he thought HARD about what his love was saying to him…and came to a very real and disappointing realization.

"You're right, Usako. You're absolutely right. I only wanted to keep you safe. I didn't even consider telling you about the dreams…I'm sorry." He cupped her chin in his hand and brought her close enough to feel her breath on his face. "But I promise from now on that I'll treat you the way I should…with the respect you deserve."

Soft lips came down on his mouth. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, Usako." He wrapped his arms even more tightly around the petite blonde and surveyed the meal still spread out over the table, long forgotten and cold by now.

"Usako, how about I make you a cup of hot chocolate at my place?"

She smiled sadly with a quiet laugh. "It's late, shouldn't I be getting home?"

His tender expression was like a caress on her face.

"Probably. But I don't care. Right now, I just need to hold you." He stood and took her hand in his, kissing it before pulling her up and leading her out of the arcade.

~FIN~


End file.
